My Dear Single Sisters

My Dear Single Sisters,

This post is tender and heartfelt. I see you. I have great sensitivity toward your struggle. I know that your heart is good. I know how you ache to have the life and family you have always dreamed of, how it often feels beyond your grasp.  You gaze around at your friends and family members who are dating or are already married.  You feel happy for them, but there is a part of your heart that feels slighted.  You wonder when it will be your turn.  You work so hard at being patient, staying busy, becoming the woman of purpose that you know God is calling you to be. You spend time serving, working, taking care of yourself, and praying for that unknown love that you hope and pray God will send to you.  But...in the back of your mind you wonder. You feel a sense of urgency and panic. You shake your fist and call out, "God, is there really someone out there for me?  Am I taking the right steps in the meantime? Is this preparation some kind of cruel joke?  Every time I open my heart to the possibility of someone, the hope gets snatched away."  Has this ever applied to you?

"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, 

but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life."

~Proverbs 13:12~

I looked up the meaning of the word "deferred" and I found these definitions:

• Postponed or delayed
• Withheld until a future date

Does your heart feel sick with wonder and worry about the future of your hopes and dreams? Those ones you guard close to your heart? I honor your commitment to Christ. I want to encourage you that He sees each freshly fallen tear that falls to your pillow on those lonely nights when you ache to hold or be held by another, to grow old with someone and share your love through your children, when your arms long to hold your own babies in your arms.  When sometimes it feels like your own biological clock is ticking so loudly, you have to cover your ears or bury yourself in busyness to get away from it.  This letter is for you, my sisters. These are words that I felt deep in my soul during my single years. I share them now with you:

"My love,

I long to hold you.  Will you come to Me? I will hear and heal your heart. I catch each fallen tear.

I know you don't understand what I am doing.  You feel like life has dealt you such an unfair blow. You wonder if you have done something wrong along the way, as though the blessing of marriage and a family has been withheld from you.  Is this why you feel that your hope has been delayed?  When your heart feels sick, you feel prone to become discouraged and depressed.  I know that prolonged waiting takes its toll on you.  Your eyes are constantly on the future, toward that unseen goal.  The unknown stretches out before you.  You cry out to Me and wonder if I hear you.  Take heart. I am with you always.  Let your longing be for Me.  Let Me be your First Love. Look to Me always.  Let the pain of wondering cause you to consider the everyday joys I have placed before you.  If you begin to doubt, remember this truth:

You are my child. I am pleased with you. I see the way you love those around you.  I notice the way you are turning your heart toward Me.  I am preparing you for the next moments.  Trust Me for the future.  I hold your hope, and I will not disappoint you.  Look up to Me.  When your heart grows faint, let Me hold you so that you can become strong again.  Hide your heart in the truth of My word and My thoughts of you. Your joy is in Me.  Hold your head high, My daughter.  Let Me be your healer."  

Sincerely, the Keeper of your Hopes and Dreams <3

I am now on the "other side". Yet I distinctly remember that delicate and vulnerable time of life as if it were yesterday. I have been married for almost 8 years now. If you ask my husband, he will tell you the story of how I fought God's plan for us even in those early years before marriage. Don't get me wrong. I longed for a husband, a home, and a family of my own, but I often held very tightly to my own hopes and dreams for how I thought love would come to be.  I tried to limit God. I ignorantly determined that I could control how and when He would choose to bring my husband to me.  My hope was often deferred, but I am so thankful that God reminds me time and again, even now, to turn my gaze toward His, learn from Him, and become the woman He is calling me to be in my moments. My hope still becomes "deferred" or "delayed" in different ways. God is saying to me, even as I am married and have 3 young children of my own, to be patient, relax, and enjoy this stage.  Life goes by in the blink of an eye.  Compared to eternity, what is this life really but a vapor?

"Yet you do know know what your life will be like tomorrow.

You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away."

~James 4:14~

Whether married or single, let's learn together to make our moments count.  There is joy in the journey!!

Love, Rebecca

I Will Lift My Eyes

Sometimes I look down. I forget God's promises to me.  I allow the Enemy to tell me that I cannot do something or accomplish a task.  I grow weary.  My children need my attention, even when I am not feeling well. I want to rest.  God sends just the right help when we need it most, doesn't He?  When my mother-in-law came over today, she brought a pan of lasagna, her listening ear, and eyes that chose to look up even as I told her to step on the pile of dirty laundry that was on the floor, waiting to be sorted and washed.  She saw the needs.  She saw, loved, and accepted ME. As she sat and folded my clean clothes and watched my kids so that I could take an uninterrupted bath, I remembered that life is so much more than the worries and wondering.  It is about trusting Him for each moment. Realizing that it is not a coincidence that the verses I have been thinking about "show up" in a message at church on Sunday, that maybe getting sick and being at home unexpectedly to recover is really a chance to slow down, rest,  and reflect. I was even blessed by 2 high school girls that came over this evening, played with my kids, and gave me a few moments of peace.  I may not have been receptive to that blessing had I not been willing to remember this truth:

I lift up my eyes to the hills—

where does my help come from?

My help comes from the LORD,

the Maker of heaven and earth.

~Psalm 121:1-2~

~ Looking Up ~

He often brings help in the most unexpected ways.  Today was such a great example of that! I wrote in a previous post about laying my palms open, expecting joy, forgetting that holding my fist tight is such a normal response, that I will have to train my mind to ask God to renew me, to change me from within. That when we seek God, the Enemy of our souls presses back hard against us. Do you ever feel like giving up the fight? In lifting up my eyes, I am reminded tonight that God is my Healer.  Have you considered that in your situation?  That He is more than enough for you?  That as you lift up your eyes, He hears you and cares deeply about what you are going through!  I was reading the parable of the Sower tonight, found in Matthew 13.  Verses 14-15 caught my eye.

“‘You will be ever hearing but never understanding;

    you will be ever seeing but never perceiving.

 

For this people’s heart has become calloused;

    they hardly hear with their ears,

    and they have closed their eyes.

Otherwise they might see with their eyes,

    hear with their ears,

    understand with their hearts

and turn, and I would heal them.’

If I see with my eyes, hear with my ears, and understand with my heart, and TURN toward my Savior, He will Heal me.  What a profound truth. My heart sometimes becomes calloused. How about yours? I considered that this evening, even as my 2 year old came over to me.  In a rare moment of stillness, she sat with me and turned the board book pages of her children's Bible as I felt like a child myself at the feet of Jesus, reading this story. I think it can become easy to fall into a mode where our hearts do become hardened to the truth.  Life circumstances cause us not to "hear" truth as readily and softly accept it as we did before.  I pray for ready soil, an open heart, and a life ready to learn what God has for me in my moments.  Join me? <3

Be Renewed

Just for today, choose to renew your mind. Clear away the negative thoughts and focus on who you are in Me. Reflect on this verse:

"but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint."

~Isaiah 40:31~

Guard Your Affections

"Above all else, guard your affections. For they influence everything else in your life."

~Proverbs 4:23~

My Child,

I see you there, in the midst of your piles of laundry, dishes, folded clothes not yet put away, piles of things you hoped to organize yet shoved in a dark corner of the room. Feelings of inadequacy threaten to drown out the promise of a day filled with hope, light, and victory.  The main message I am whispering to your soul today:

I am real, I am here. Invite me to come. I will work with you. I will help you today. You can't face this day on your own. Come to Me. I know you are weary. I know how you beat yourself down while seeing the good in others.  Your heart is sincere.  Give it to Me. You can trust Me.

Love again and always, Your Healer

Look To Me

My Daughter,

Look up to Me.  There are so many things competing for your attention today.  Seek Me first.  Include Me in every detail of your life.  Hanson eating peaches for the first time, Hannah and Hailey going up and down the slide, turning your face toward the sun and just being at peace, those are all gifts from Me.  Let me deliver you from your fears. Right now, this moment, is where I am. I am with you always.

Love, Your Lord <3

"I sought the LORD, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame."

~Psalm 34:4-5~

Always My Girl

I am going to write out some messages God is speaking to me, daily when possible!  Here's one for today:

Beloved,
Lift up your head.  You are My girl.  I love you dearly.  Nothing can separate you from My love (Romans 8:38-39).  Do not fear (2 Timothy 1:7).  No matter what you feel or think about yourself, you can always count on Me (John 16:33).  You will ALWAYS be My girl (Isaiah 43:2).  
Love, Your Maker

A song of praise from the past!! 
Lifter of my head!!
Hallelujah!  Hallelujah! You're the lifter of my head!!!

"He must become greater; I must become less."

~ John 3:30 ~

A Stone of Remembrance - Faith

This very day is a milestone for me.  Let me take you back to February 6, 1998.  For as long as I can remember, God has been a part of my life. I grew up going to church, hearing the Bible stories in Sunday School, memorizing the verses, praying at meals and bed time. I always wanted it to be more than mere ritual. It would be this very day that would serve as a pivotal turning point in my life.  As I considered what to write in this post, I thought back to the Old Testament.  God's chosen people had just crossed the Jordan River into the Promised Land  (Check out Joshua 4 when you get a chance.). I love this explanation of the concept, taken from Our Daily Bread:

"The Israelites of Joshua’s day placed “stones of remembrance” by the Jordan River. They were to remind their children of the remarkable providence of God as He guided His chosen people into the land of promise.

Like those stones, the statements I penned in my Bible long ago keep calling me back to important truths. They recall my own journey from childhood to the present as God has directed me through His Word to know His will.

What reminders from the past protect your heart, guide your steps, and occupy your mind? Thank God today for the great truths of the Bible that keep calling you closer to Him. Consider them your stones of remembrance."

My "stone of remembrance" for today is the moment I realized that I wanted to completely surrender my will to God.  I wanted my faith to become my own.  I remember sitting there in the gym that afternoon.  I was a sophomore in high school, just shy of my 16th birthday, my whole future stretching out before me like a new canvas waiting for each precious brush stroke of color and form.  The possibilities seemed endless. God had started getting my attention the year before, when I read Max Lucado's When God Whispers Your Name. Check out this link to part of chapter 11 here:

When God Whispers Your Name

I love the concept of choice. I have a choice about what kind of a day I will have.  Will I choose faith and freedom, or will I fall into fear and worry?  Do you ever sense that you were made for more than this life?  That you have a purpose in your days greater than you could ever imagine?  I have felt that way, longed for it most of my life.  I remember reading that book, wanting so much to live out those truths, even in the simple every day moments of life.

There, in that gym, at the youth rally, 15 years ago today, I heard God whispering my name. I could hear my heart pounding in my ears that afternoon.  Two guys had come to talk to our group of teens about renewing our first love.  Check out this link to one of my favorite songs by a group called Avalon.

Avalon -First Love

They talked about how they had known about God their whole lives, but had never fully surrendered to His will.  They wondered if any of us felt the same way.  I looked around nervously that day.  I wondered what my peers would think of me.  They already knew I loved God, right?  What did that mean? How was I living that out?  Was I willing to fully surrender my will?  To allow Him to pick me up when I fall, to stop trying to plow through life in my own strength? I am so thankful that I was.  I raised my hand that day, prayed for God to remind me of the truths of His word and His will, committed to following after Him wholeheartedly, one step at a time.  I walked down to the front that day, spoke into the microphone, that I was renewing my faith in God and willing for Him to work in my life.  No halo appeared around my head that day.  No magical potion or chant was recited.  I do know that a life, mine, was changed, a path was turned toward the Light.  

Stones of Remembrance...always adding!

In honor of this milestone, I pick up this stone of remembrance, this faith that I cling to more than the air I breathe.  I offer it up gratefully. Thank You, Father, for rescuing me, for bringing me to this place!  I never dreamed that when You called me down to that gym floor this day so long ago, that you would have such great plans for my life.  That I would move all the way across the country to raise a family and a new legacy of truth for my little ones.  Thank you for my husband, who walks alongside me, takes my hand, and journeys with me even through the tough days when I stumble and fall.  I came across some truths several years back that I like to read. They help me start my days sometimes, when the weight of the world presses heavy.  I am going to share 15 of them with you today:

1. Just for today I will take time to remember that I have blessings untold.

2. Just for today I will try to lend a helping hand to someone who is broken.

3. Just for today I will let my spirit heal.

4. Just for today I will embrace time as if there is no tomorrow.

5. Just for today I will let my mind believe the impossible. 

6. Just for today I will not lean on my own understanding but rely on God's Wisdom.

7. Just for today I will remember that I have everything I need and many things I want.

8. Just for today I will forgive and forget so that I can be forgiven.

9. Just for today I will not complain about my trials. They are for growing and learning.

10. Just for today I will tell someone I love them.

11. Just for today I will not be discouraged.

12. Just for today I will try to give my mind more strength and knowledge.

13. Just for today I will try to accept where I am, and not try to adjust everything to what I want.

14. Just for today I will not let myself become overwhelmed.

15. Just for today I will accept what life brings, though I may not understand, because I know that God has a plan.

I want to close with one more song link.  I listened to the group Avalon a lot in high school.  There was one song in particular about dreams.  I have always wanted to open my hands and allow God's dreams to become my own, not clutching too tightly to my own.  This song expresses that truth beautifully!  Keep adding to your stones of remembrance! I would love to read some of yours if you want to leave them in the comments! Our dreams are safe with Him! No matter who you are or where you have been in life....He's whispering your name, too! <3

Avalon - Dreams I Dream For You